The term “forever family” seems to be in common use among adopters these days. Presumably it is intended to make adopted children feel they are secure.
On the right is an example of just how secure they really are. As far as I can see, it is a genuine letter to a genuine columnist in Seattle, USA.
This left me speechless with shock and I feel quite unable to express the depth of disgust I feel. Why were these parents given a child to adopt, without being educated about the problems they might encounter, and how to help their new child? I hope this sort of situation does not arise often, but I suspect that it does.
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The columnist’s reply included “I hope you return the child only as a last resort, because she shouldn't
be made to feel like an animal at a Humane Society shelter, hoping for the permanent adoption that finally
sticks.”
To see the complete correspondence click here:
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/brothers/280507
_joyce829.html
And read what a therapist who is an adoptee has to say about the use of the term "forever family": http://www.adopting.org/adoptions/forever-families-adoption-and-adoptive-parenting.html
I admit that I have my own issues with this, because my adoptive father threatened to send me away, when I was going through the “troublesome teenager” stage. I can’t think of anything more damaging to a child than being given up twice – except perhaps being given up three times..................